Live from the Haywood Park Hotel Ballroom, stealing internet from the Bier Garden, it's the Spirits of AshEVILle Live Blog! We're 6 hours away from the event. Dress and tech rehearsal was supposed to start 20 minutes ago, but less than half the performers are here so everything is off to the usual Asheville start. And now most of the performers who are here have gone to Bier Garden for a drink. I guess that compensates for me using their interweeb.
The setup of the place is pretty nice, Halloween Express have put decorations out and on the table, and the Urban Peasantry people are putting up panels. There's a full lighting panel, and a sound check has just started. Beer is yet to arrive, but that's probably a good idea, with us having six hours until showtime.
The past few weeks have been a blur and I haven't been keeping up with the bloggy world (and if you're a friend who whom I owe an email, that goes for you as well).
Tomorrow is Halloween and the Spirits of ashEVILle Masquerade. The Feral Chihuahuas will be performing a bunch of sketches - I've got pretty limited participation in this one, but I will be reprising my turn as Bruce, the Ghost of Halloween Past.
Tickets are $20 online, but if you go to either location of Asheville Brewing Co, and mention the facebook ad (this counts as a facebook ad, I guess), then you can get them at a discount.
I was planning on going to the BlogAsheville party tonight, but I've come down with some lurgy - I hope it's a fun party, the last two were awesome fun.
Last night was a good night for the Oxymorons at Razcals - one of the biggest crowds yet, most people stayed for the whole show, some really funny moments, and at the end there were were so many cries for more that the rest of us (I wasn't in the cast last night) got up to do a special show-ender. I got to pretend to be Carrot Top. Some days I wish I was Carrot Top.
Wednesday night - that's tomorrow is another special show, one of our new "Feral Chihuahuas Presents" shows. Katie, Sarah and I are going to be providing some entertainment at the Martini Wednesday event at The Venue. We have a few more of these "Feral Chihuahuas Presents" where a few of us will be doing our thing in an intimate venue.
Now for the big news - on Halloween Night the Feral Chihuahuas will be part of the biggest show and party Asheville has seen in a long time. The venue is the Haywood Park Hotel Ballroom, and here's what is on tap...
Sketches from the Feral Chihuahuas
Sideshow entertainment from Arts2People
Beer from Asheville Brewers Alliance
Costume Contest
DJs
And...
The debut of the second Feral Chihuahuas Musical! Tommy has taken perennial favorite "The Halloween Carol" and ramped it up with new jokes and songs. I'm a terrible singer, but I'm going to work my ass off on getting this right.
Come back here for ticket details and a full line-up soon.
Didn't get to perform on the weekend, which was a bit of a disappointment, but I heard that people who went to the show at Coxe Ave on the weekend had a good time and a creepy time. Which I think was the intention all along.
Unexpectedly, it looks like I'm in the show tonight at Razcals. So come out at 8pm for a free show with the OxyMorons - it's going to be a really intriguing lineup of morons tonight, possibly someone I've never performed before with (does that sentence make sense?). Free show - keep Razcals happy by buying drinks and food.
I'll be doing improv with the OxyMorons tonight at Razcal's bar - Old Fairview Road in East Asheville (Fairview represent!). I'm looking forward to tonight's show, should be an all-star lineup out there. Show is free, just buy enough food and drinks to keep yourself slinging outrageous suggestions at me.
There's some new videos up at the Feral Chihuahuas YouTube from this season...
Man Douche. Yes, we were using Axe cans as the spray and we all smelled like Cinjades at the end. Adam was the true trooper of this shoot, he took a full face of body spray to the face in that end shot and didn't flinch. You can also see a reason as to why I went with the short hair this year, check out the mane underneath the wig in that first scene.
The Intro for "King of Kings" - I love the intro, was never too big on the sketch (though it gave me a chance to eat cheetos on stage). I love my poking my tongue out in disgust at the end, we don't do many profile shots.
Wyman did some amazing work on these, even after we showed them during our shows this year. Way to go Wyman!
Went to see "Inglourious Basterds" on the weekend. Brilliant from start to finish, and Christoph Waltz is the perfect villain!!!! The every syllable dripping sarcasm works through the whole film, and kudos to that first scene being stretched to breaking point to set the scene for what a prick he is going to be to everyone.
Tonight is the OxyMorons show at Razcals - if you're looking to laugh tonight I can't recommend this more highly. Come down and challenge the Bastard! It's an interesting venue, personally I love trying to win over the crowd who come not realising there's an improv show on. If I can get a laugh out of them, it's a victory. Takes me way back to two bad early stand-up experiences, both in Australia.
One was at a bar in Melbourne that ran comedy regularly, but most of the time it was just the comedians in the crowd. I was trying to do my set, and there were a bunch of guys playing pool who were way louder than the few actually listening. I was trying to time punchlines to after one of them making a shot, so at least there would be some reaction.
The other was in Hobart, Tasmania. A bar that had never done comedy before decided to try a comedy night, and it was a one-and-done situation. There weren't a lot of people there, but of the few who were there to listen to the comedy, two of them were kids writing a report for their High School (and since they had to have an adult with them - in bars in Australia anyone can come in provided they're with an adult), their mother was there sitting with them... and her knitting. She sat there alternating being appalled and pretending not to listen, and smacking the kids if they laughed - it didn't help that of the three comedians, I was doing the filthy stuff, we had one guy doing mostly drug-related material, and a goth kid doing monologues about being suicidal. To cap it off, the bar didn't turn off the jukebox - so particularly during the goth kid's set, he was getting drowned out by the singing.
I love me a hostile crowd! But I also love a bar full of people who want to laugh - so here's hoping tonight is more of the latter than the former. Bring it on, Razcals!
Been gone for a while, didn't get any official performing in while I was gone, sadly, but now I'm back and ready to get back into it.
LAAFF is coming up over Labor Day weekend - it seems to be year on/year off that I do something at LAAFF and this is an "on" year. If you take the LaZoom shuttle bus to and from LAAFF, there's a chance that you'll get some Bastard or some Feral Chihuahuas entertainment while you're being shuttled.
The OxyMorons are still going strong at Razcals on Monday night - and karaoke comes straight after us! Come see the show and then challenge me to sing something. I'm a really terrible singer!
So last weekend I did just about the most disgusting thing I've ever done in the name of comedy, and it should be in a film at the Feral Chihuahuas shows this weekend. I have a prior commitment out of town, but Tommy, Andrew, Katie, Sarah, Drew and Adam will be bringing the funny to the Asheville Arts Center for one last time. I think the next Feral Chihuahuas show will be a Halloween Extravaganza, so don't miss this. There's also going to be the debut of the new Feral Chihuahuas t-shirt.
Asheville Arts Center, 8pm Friday and Saturday night, $10 - all new sketches, songs and films!
Monday night I think was my best performance with the OxyMorons at Razcals. I was really happy with how things went at 35 Below earlier this summer, but overall I think last night was a truly great show. Eating cottage cheese with hot wax while Drew wrapped me in bacon, followed by a disaster of a Mexican-themed party with Sarah, continuing my unbeaten streak in Feudalism (Drew and I nailed "Film Noir"), and then some truly inspiring audience suggestions for "I like my men like I like my ..." rounded out an evening of laughs.
The OxyMorons are at Razcals every Monday at 8, with karaoke following at 10. I'm not always in the show, so check back here and I'll try to keep you updated on which shows I'm in, but it's always a good laugh and FREE!
It's show #3 of our big summer season - "Introduction to Western Civilization"
We're packing together sketches of historical significance with new films, audience participation, crazy new bits and a possible return of a great hit from the April Fool's Day show - "George 'the' Bastard Reads Notices".
I've got a lot of roles in this show too, probably penance for not being able to be in the last show (I'll be writing and in films, but I won't be on stage for the season finale).
Visit Feralton at the Asheville Arts Center (308 Merrimon Ave) the Friday and Saturday at 8pm to find out
Can Emily Dickinson impress her poetry teacher?
Did Nirvana write the plot for porn?
Can you take financial advice from a man with bad hair?
What can the French New Wave do for you?
What did Hamlet really do to Ophelia?
Whose feet did I give a thorough rubbing to this week?
It's been a while, and things have been motoring along in the world of the Bastard.
The Feral Chihuahuas went to Ohio to the Shadowbox Sketch Comedy festival. Shadowbox is quite the entity, and if you happen to be near Columbus, you need to check them out! It's like a commune with a theatre - the gang there do everything from writing to performing to cooking. We were treated like royalty, and if you've been to a Feral Chihuahuas show you know that we don't just bring the funny, but we love to entertain and we were the party planners for the late night gazebo sessions at the hotel. I have no idea how we weren't kicked out of the rather nice Marriot Courtyard.
For Day #1 we got a tour of the facility at Shadowbox and worked through our material on the stage. In typical Chihuahuas fashion we were something like 87 minutes longer than we thought we were, so cuts had to be made. I was hoping we'd cut everything I was in but Facescroll so I wouldn't have to change costume at all, but I ended up in two of our pieces so there was one piece of rapid costume changes.
Performance went well - the audience at Shadowbox were there to LAUGH!!! All six of the groups got at least one great reaction, and our set went really well. The only role I had that was meant to get a lot of laughs was as Postings in Facescroll, and it suits me pretty well, I just have to deliver lines in a silly voice, no acting required.
A few of the Shadowbox people came and joined us at the hotel late at night - yay for 3am drinking and philosophising with fellow funny people, particularly the guys from Laughter League, Cell Camp and the Indicators. Here's some samples of these groups...
Laughter League's "You-scan-it" sketch. Although the idea has been kind of done before, the cap is brilliant!
Most of the sketches that I really liked by Cell Camp aren't on their YouTube, but I wish they'd done this one live - "Can I fart in here"?
The Indicators also don't have their funniest stuff online - they were the first group I got to know (because their table was between ours and the buffet).
Far less hungover than I had any right to be, I emerged for Wednesday's festivities. The plan for Wednesday's show was to highlight the "best of the fest", although I wasn't sure about them breaking up sketches into smaller parts to thread through the show, it might have been a better idea to give each group two sketches, one long and one short. For us, they picked "Gangster Rap for the Hearing Impaired" so I had a whole day to watch and hang out. I ended up being picked for one of the few lines in the Garrett Morris sketch, so I suddenly had something to do. In the sketch, a lot of us had to play kids - Joe from Laughter League and I both had beanies, "just in case" (hey Joe, if you're reading, did the picture of us come out?).
Wednesday night's show was a blast - a lot of audience members came to both shows, so at the end I had a few crowd people come up and say they liked Face Scroll (and one person who confused me for someone in Cell Camp - with great apologies to whomever in Cell Camp looks or sounds like me). I got to see almost all of the show from the little back corral area, and Shadowbox's lighting and mic effects really helped a few of the sketches. Drew and Tommy stretched Gangsta Rap out for an eternity!
There was some pretty nice press around the event too. Metromix Columbus pointed out that the Feral Chihuahuas took the risks and got the rewards. Columbus Dispatch gave us much love, with reviews of the shows on Tuesday and Wednesday.
Staggered back to the hotel late at night to see that the Laughter League had commandeered the pool, so joined in. This was followed by more drinking and merriment, and a fairly sombre drive back to Asheville on Thursday.
Shadowbox! Can't thank you enough for amazing organization of a terrific festival. I want to go back!
The Feral Chihuahuas are back with Show #2 of the summer series - Social Patchworking Sorcery. I'm looking forward to this in a big way. For a start, I get to play a waiter. I play a lot of waiters, although I have never been a waiter. I think enough of the rest of the Chihuahuas have been waiters, and want to see what my take on it is.
Second, there's going to be a really great film/sketch tie-in. I haven't seen the film parts yet, but the film/sketch tie-in excites me. Sarah wrote the script and I got my grotty fingers into it, and it's my favorite three-parter in a long long time.
Third, I will be wearing the pants I wore in "Vending Love". I don't get to wear them very often, and that is a shame. So come see what it's all about. Downtown Asheville is going to be a noisy, overcrowded mess, so drop $10 on an evening with friends, laughs, and easy-to-find parking. It's at the Asheville Arts Center, 308 Merrimon Ave.
Well I'm back from my four day trip to an undisclosed location. Not sure if I've changed the world, but I may just have made it a funnier place. I did a little blog maintenance when I got back, I finally got around to modifying Shad Marsh's blog (VOTE FOR HIM!!). As official stand-up comedian of the Marsh For Mayor campaign, I will be coming up with jokes and offensive stances to further sink his perilous ship. I've added Nathan Adams' page of intriguing art and performance in Asheville. I'm a big fan of Nathan and was hoping to use him in a stand-up night that originally fell through but may be back on (look for details in September).
The full article is great, and the press version has some really nice reprints of pictures including some from our season-opener just over a week ago! The next set of Feral Chihuahuas shows are this upcoming weekend - Friday and Saturday nights at the Asheville Arts Center. I'll have some new stand-up, and we're finally working the films into the sketches, so come out and see a series of firsts.
Been one crazy week here in Bastardville, three shows, a mystery illness, some travel and some more travel coming up soon.
The first two Feral Chihuahuas shows are in the bag, and if you missed them, make sure you catch some of the remaining shows. If you were there, you know you need to catch more of the shows. Great audiences each night, delicious drinks, venue rocking, and the stage for Feralton helps out a lot with the show.
Got an unexpected laugh on Saturday night by being caught on stage moving scenery and throwing myself behind a curtain, so look for a few more stage-hand antics. I am not in that many sketches, so I try to make sure that I'm setting the stage to make it look good.
Monday was my first show at Razcals - great to see some of the Drinking Liberally people there, and a few new faces (the couple from Alabama, if you've made it here, hi!). Looks like those shows are building a reasonable crowd, but it would be nice if they could be a bit more popular.
Didn't make it to a bunch of things at the end of the week with some mystery stomach bug, and I'm travelling the next few days, but I'll be back in Asheville next weekend for more Feral Chihuahuaness!
So in my absence, go see the Oxymorons at Razcals on Monday night at 8pm. Drinks specials, free show and now air conditioning!
Last night we finished putting together the set and the technical details for the summer series. We've gone ambitious - there's a set for Feralton, creepy Feral Chihuahuas will be looking at you from all angles, and we've re-set the stage so there should be none of the bad lines of viewing that there were in a few sketches in the April Fools show. I put an impressive blister on my thumb working on these sets.
I've got some new (some of it topical, but I promise - no Michael Jackson jokes) stand-up to open proceedings tonight and tomorrow night.
Semi-dress rehearsal with the new set went well last night. We have never rehearsed as much for one show (whether that will show tonight is a matter for debate and debauchery).
Shows are July 3 and 4 at 8pm. There's still tickets available for both nights, $10 online or at the door (if any tickets are left or anyone walks out in disgust - I call that "vertical applause").
If that wasn't enough comedy (or Bastard) for you, I'm also doing improv with the OxyMorons at Razcals at 8pm on Monday night. I'll be coming up with one-liners based on your ideas, so come out and stump the Bastard!
The debut of new Feral Chihuahua Adam Meier - see him on film, see him live
A new set constructed for this summer season
Hysterical live sketches and films that you will see nowhere else
Two musical acts
Stand-up from George "the" Bastard
Pre-show slide-show - come early, sit close and enjoy some pretertainment
Get your tickets now - there's limited seating, and our last show sold out well in advance. Select a date from the drop down menu and you're on your way to Feralton!
In between rehearsing for the upcoming Feral Chihuahuas season-opener I'm going to be in a few shows over the weekend.
It's the third year of the Asheville Community Theater's Late Night Comedy Series at 35 Below, and this weekend will be two shows by the Oxymorons. These will be the first shows to really feature some of the newer members of the improv group, and will be my re-introduction to improv.
Shows are Friday and Saturday nights, 8pm at 35 Below (enter on Market St). Tickets are only $10
After the show on Saturday, I'll be heading down to NC Stage Company for the Best of No Shame Theatre - my piece "The Rise and Fall of the Alliteranation" was nominated. Show starts at 11 and should be a riot. Tickets are $5 at the door - this will be one of the strangest shows you will ever see!
Ideas this awesome never come along - homeless people, the musical? When it gets produced, I volunteer to be the ticket-taker.
Hey man, I just need you to come see my show, you see my old lady is with my car at the garage and I just need $3.57 to get to her or I'll lose my car. God bless.
Decided to try a new, leaner, meaner, more slim-lined Bastard look for this summer so I cut off most of my hair on Friday.
Rehearsals for the July 3 and 4 Feral Chihuahuas shows start tonight! It's going to be a great show, tickets should be available in the next day or two from our brand-new website.
Tonight you can catch the Oxymorons live at Razcals - I can't be there tonight but that just means that "beer sausage" most likely will not get used in a game.
I know it had come close a couple of times, but I was always keeping my fingers crossed - the idea was brilliant, the coffee good, the crowd extremely dingy and sour. They were a sponsor of the Feral Chihuahuas two years ago and I ran a pretty decent open mic night there (with an ugly fallout, but that wasn't Caffiend's fault).
Now I'm going to need to find a new place for morning coffee (it was pointed out on the weekend that I always have either a beer or a coffee in hand).
There's going to be a closeout bash for Caffiend tomorrow night, I'll stop by.
I am Asheville's most offensive, least-funny stand-up comedian. Come see my shows with the Feral Chihuahuas and other projects. Also read about intractable crosswords and my frustration at being unable to solve them.
