Recent bastardries

I have been slack in updating the blog - non comedy projects have taken over lately and I haven't had much time to attempt to be funny. The world is the victor in all of this.

I was in Charlotte over the weekend and checked out Charlotte Comedy Theatre's improv group. They do long-form improv on Saturday nights which is definitely worth seeing, though I think they maybe had one or two members too many. They have an interesting performance space in a hallway behind a smoky bar - you can buy drinks from the bar and bring them in. Robot Johnson do shows there sometimes too and there's an open-mic night (next time I'll hand out for open mic and give them a taste of the Bastard).

I was back in Asheville on Sunday and went to see Danielson at the Grey Eagle. This was my second time seeing Danielson and they've had a few major lineup changes, but they were pretty tight and put on a really fun show. I had seen some clips online of the openers, Cryptacize online and they didn't disappoint (and their members bolstered up Danielson). There were no Cryptacize CDs left, so no additions to the You Suck set. Small crowd, but it was a weird night to have a show.

Things are quiet on the Bastard and Feral Chihuahuas front at the moment, as we're busy editing the shows from summer for some highlight shows to go out on URTV. We're targeting an Inauguration show as the next special performance, watch this space for details.

The Simpsons made me laugh out loud

I'm still a loyal watcher, but it's not often lately that the Simpsons has seriously cracked me out, but the end of the Homer killing celebrities had me cracking up.

Homer: Is your wife up here?
Abraham Lincoln: We have an arrangement.

Abraham Lincoln puts his hand on Homer's butt.

Whoever wrote that, mega kudos - I noticed Bob Odenkirk on the writers list...

The greatest unibrow in history is now history...

An old friend sent me this video about a guy I used to hang out with in college. It appeared that some time in the 90s he started trimming his beard. And we used to hang out in day-glo t-shirts to deliberately piss people off. This is also some degree of proof that TV in Australia is no better than TV in the US.



Good news - I found a recent clip of Steven, and although it looks like he's cutting his hair regularly again, the unibrow is making itself seen again

And after the Hellelection, the Halloween

I was Satan Claus for Halloween and went to a pretty fun party at a friend's place, drank a lot and got into loud conversations with someone I had no right to be talking to in the first place, good times.

Not sure exactly what to make of the photo, though.

Wyman tells me that Autoerotic Asphyxiation is now the most-viewed Feral Chihuahuas clip on YouTube. This apparently has a lot to do with it being linked by two Japanese porn sites - warning, link not safe for work. What would we do without Japanese porn?

Won't be able to use this one again...

Rather a number of things have happened in the last few days, so much so fast.

The Hellelection show was great - I was in the audience (I read one line for one sketch) and had a ball. Took me back to my early days with the Feral Chihuahuas where I was a writer, I did my stand-up, then sat back in the audience while Tommy, Liz, Jay, Travis and sometimes Karl did the sketches. You really get a vibe in the audience, it's not something I could do with stand-up, but finding out what moves an audience really helps.

The performances were terrific, and Katie and Sarah in the opening segment are going to stick in my mind's eye for a long time. That's one way to guarantee our sponsors will come back (I hope).

The show closer was a piece close to my heart, it was the first song that Tommy and I worked on together - I had an idea for a song and some lyrics, and Tommy got the guitar out and we worked out the music, then worked back over the lyrics to get everything together. We first performed it in the shed a few years ago where it brought the house down (and the Woodfin cops around). Time has run out on it, so here's it is...

"One More Term" by the Clean Skies Act
music and lyrics by Tommy Calloway and George "the" Bastard.

My mortgage foreclosed
Lost the house of my dreams
You bailed out all the banks
But not New Orleans
My bus is out of gas
I've nowhere to park my tush
I've got one question
For President Bush...

(chorus)

Why won't they let you have just one more term
The constitution on that point is firm
You've done so much in eight years yourself
I've got one question
Why can't it be twelve... or fourteen

You took on Iraq
And Afghanistan
Didn't help out Georgia much
But sized up Iran
Extended tours and
I'm sure you will find
That when you go to war
No child's left behind

(chorus)

Gas price has tripled
We line at the pump
You're drilling offshore and
The beach is a dump
Don't believe climate change
You're not a science fan
Just go on smiling with that
Hot Texas tan

(chorus)

There's no gay marriage
And we get to keep our guns (keep our fuckin' guns!)
No abortions
We've all got young'uns
Love the patriot act
And all pray in school
Vote for Barack Obama?
Hey man! That ain't cool.

Why won't they let you have just one more term
The constitution on that point is firm
You've done so much in eight years yourself
I've got one question
Why can't it be twelve... or fourteen